i guess the word for the day is changes that can never happen.

awoke late today to the sound of some renovation next door. i think maybe the guys next door doesn't seem to notice that i was asleep. fuckers.

a so called "human" of mine send me an e-mail containing this...
he add a few minor details but i think what he was really trying to do was kill off my mood again. oh well, not another day goes by until somebody really try their hardest to make me more and more depressive. try and try again as they would and yet still they won't get that certain satisfaction that they desired.

people seem to think that i AM that individual which lacks a common sensitivity towards certain aspects of life. i choose to be who i am. i remember watching my cousin always scolding me for things i didn't do when i was a kid and at this one time she even grab a bamboo stick and started to whack my feet just to hear me beg her to stop it. i found out that doing so only motivates her more and so i just stay still and accept it. painful yea, tears came out of course, but i just stood there and accepted all of it. in turn she got bored and then ran off to somewhere i don't belong.

a smile can used in two ways. one, to show that your currently very satisfied with your situation. two, to suppress all the pain inside so that nobody can ever reach for it and block anyone's attention towards caring for it. that was when my attitude towards life changed. i don't smile for happiness that often this days.

that picture made my day. merry early x'mas everyone. may your life won't as pathetic as mine.

Hi,my name is Garrz. some would call me me G where others choose to be formal and just call me by my surname. this blog is a recollection of my life and my undecided other soul. while it may seem to be suicidal in a glance, it is just an explicit form of expression of myself against the typical world. i AM a banana and i do LOVE sad pandas. contact can be made towards ybgarr@gmail.com

My Side Project /Zihan/ Parishna/Ryan

Software Used:Adobe Photoshop
Designer: ♥ ♥
Stocks: ♥

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